2012

You're quite a guy, Roland. For my fifty, I enjoyed the Himalayas of royal entertainment. Several family action scenes also attack the master of spectacular idiocy Michael Bay, but best of all: Roland has learned to poke fun at himself. Whether it's the engagement of the bristled Cusack, the figure of the Russian oligarch (his "it´s Russian" aspires to be the line of the year), or small jokes with animals. At times, I felt like I was watching a parody of The Day After Tomorrow. Of course, to put it bluntly, 2012 is a typical Roland destructive exhibition, beautifully pointed out in the author's guileless optimism. The 3 hours flow by quickly, and during wooden conversations, hard-core fans of Emmerichisms will be satisfied in a solid state, the effects suggest that water is still not quite where it needs to be, and authentic digital will say that Roland wants to go with the times. He essentially does his own thing. I hate to say it: I used to like him because I was able to make fun of him, but now, after his best Hollywood film, which 2012 undoubtedly is, I simply like him. He is so beautifully and peculiarly PURELY... fill in the noun according to your opinion. (12/13/2009)

The guilty pleasure of the century, though actually only from the point of view of how that “realistic” catastrophe takes on enormous fantasy dimensions in Emmerich’s hands. In terms of narration and direction there’s not much to complain; the story is incredibly brisk, it exploits the potential of the epic premise in an entertaining way, putting ordinary and helpless people in the middle of a huge natural disaster, and holds itself together thanks to its traditionally wide communicativeness and the systematic work with deadlines that go from micro-events (escaping from the city, escaping on a plane from an erupting volcano) to the motivations of the main story (getting the necessary information, a map for rescue and means of transportation, boarding on time and fixing a defect that could kill everyone). It’s full of clichés and last-second escapes, but that serves to intensify the massive mark it leaves in the history of the genre, also making clear that we aren’t supposed to take it seriously. On the one hand, that’s a shame because the premise calls for an intense experience, but you can’t really complain when the result is so entertaining and original in the details. Notwithstanding its lapses in logic, I love watching 2012, such a formally mastered and self-aware over-the-top blockbuster is not something we get every year. (01/29/2019)

Less monumental than I expected, much less than Independence Day, for example. The theme is partly to blame for that, after all, the end of the world is slightly less attractive than the arrival of Aliens. But the much worse and less remarkable musical component is also to blame. Unfortunately, even the actors in the main roles are not that great, either. Where did tough guy Vince Larkin go, that is a mystery to me, John Cusack is really not up to the task. The excellent Oliver Platt and a few Russian actors save it – excellent accent and lines. The visual effects are decent, some ideas are excellent, the volcano explosion is fantastic. But overall, it lacks drive and has too many directorial ideas. You are not afraid for the protagonists because you don't care about them. And I’d rather not speak about the overall and somewhat annoying family feeling that was present throughout the whole film. This is no Emmerich. This modern disaster film is pure average. (12/06/2009)

I always enjoyed Emmerich’s megalomanic demolition of our Mother Earth, and the promise that this time destruction would be ultimate left my humanity-hating self excited to the max. The trailer massage did not disappoint and the movie in itself came up to my expectations. Don’t get me wrong, it is complete bullshit, with a stupid script, but it has a certain charm. The “last minute" escapes are just mouth watering. The whole driving through L. A. scene is so ridiculously cheesy and cool, it may well make it into my TOP movie scenes. When there’s no destruction going on, we have great actors who are fun to watch. I strongly recommend watching 2012 in a movie theater. Same as with all destruction movies. - Whoa, that’s a big plane. - It’s Russian. (11/20/2009)

The potential for fun is utilized to the maximum in 2012. The individual scenes are clichés, but as a whole they take the story through not entirely predictable paths and give us more than we’ve seen in the trailers. I didn’t feel for a moment that the movie tries to look more serious than it should – Roland Emmerich is surprisingly able to balance every absurdity with an adequate dose of humor (the ride through L.A. in a limousine that, among other things, gets splashed by the contents of a gully sucker, is a pure comedy that has no place in a disaster movie), but he’s also able to impress (amazing tidal waves). But what most surprised me about 2012 and made me give it four stars (and no, it wasn’t the special effects, which were mediocre in places, and definitely not the cheap digital-camera look that we might have to get used to even with big-budget eye-candy movies) is the political approach: the least ethical figure in the film is the US government big shot, the rich are criticized for saving their necks at the expense of the workers, and this time the world’s salvation is not the American flag, but a full-screen map with the word “CHINA” written on it. The American flag is rather ridiculed thanks to the comical character played by Woody Harrelson (in a great scene on a hill with a valley view). And every big nation/continent is represented by either an aptly written and cast supporting character (the Russian family of three and their dog are my favorites) or at least symbolically mentioned (Africa...). 2012 is a blockbuster disaster flick that is so audience-friendly that it, together with its high entertaining value, managed to worm its way into my heart. And I don’t give a crap that Mona Lisa is overlooking the Eiffel Tower from the Louvre in the film. ___ Second viewing: I wish Emmerich was a big shot politician – then there’d be no wars and everyone would just amicably hold each other’s hand (and go to the movies). This movie is just overflowing with his love for old Hollywood adventure/disaster flicks. The ultimate guilty pleasure. (11/05/2009)