Pain & Gain

Any chance of something smarter and more satirical is erased by the fact that Michael Bay is in the director’s chair, a creator with the mentality, the taste and the ethical views of a 10 year-old kid. Pain and Gain is the embodiment of what I despise in films: romanticisation of wretched characters, worship of violence, shooting from the hip and primitive humour. The argument that the movie is actually a critique of its stupid, primitive and shallow characters is only a cheap excuse for those who want justify to themselves the sad fact that they believe that all that blunt corporeality and jokes at the expense of fat people, gays and immigrants, and the glorification of violence are cool. Just like Bay. (08/12/2013)

A similarly absurd spectacle to the Coen brothers' legendary Fargo. It's so bizarre, cynical and aptly ironic, so politically incorrect, so dehumanisingly testoste-packed, that in a perverse sort of way it's impossible not to like it. Moreover, it brutally kicks the ass of the notorious idea of the American dream of a land of unlimited possibilities, where everything can be achieved with diligence and ambition. The tragicomic figures with a dumbbell and a dollar sign for a brain, accurately portrayed by Mark Wahlberg and Dwayne Johnson, were a delight to watch. I’ve never been and I am not a fan of Michael Bay, he’s never known, and still doesn't know, moderation in his films, but here he actually turned this unfortunate trait into something unexpected: his best film. (08/10/2013)

In the context of sweat and blood, there is often talk of black humor and crazy fun. But I didn't notice anything like that, and please, I like black humor, and I was quite curious to see how Michael Bay would make a story about people who empowered everything but their brains, a story made for the Coen brothers. He filmed it well, it has his style and flair, but I didn't like a single character in it, the humor was still one-note, the only bright spot of the more than two-hour spectacle was Ed Harris who didn't get much space... I just felt quite out of place when something was happening on the screen that I was supposed to be laughing at, but I wasn't. Michael Bay's worst movie. (08/09/2015)

Tony Scott is in God’s truth and so the throne for the king of sexy filtered filmmaking is once again at the disposal of one man. I never expected Michael Bay to confirm his status as a conversational crime comedy even in my wildest dreams, which is mainly due to the brilliantly absurd script, excellent actors, and the director's obvious desire to make something for his own entertainment. This is definitely the best Michael Bay film since... well, since The Rock. (08/29/2013)

Bay in his best form. A twisted story about how a bunch of bodybuilders decided to take a path to riches and glory. And God heard their pleads. Pain and Gain are down to earth Bad Boys 2, where reality (the plot is based on a true story) is often more incredible than even the worst Hollywood kitsch. Uncle Mike still shoots popcorn entertainment, this time cheaper, but, well… more entertaining. Mockery of the American dream was never this cruel and satirical. The actors handled their characters excellently, the Rock rules in his role of a dumb religious junkie (it’s a shame that we didn’t see him ride on that skateboard) and Marky Mark as a slick “man with a plan" of the gang definitely gets him some recognition. Ed Harris “merely" enjoys his role of a detective past his prime. The multi-angled storytelling, at some moments giving the viewer insight into the world behind the main characters’ brain curtains, all the way into their muddled thought processes, offers an opportunity to sympathize with each of them, because all of them have valid and very justifiable reason for their actions (hands on the grill). (08/08/2013)