J*A*S*M

After the problematic fourth and fifth parts, this was an incredibly pleasant surprise. As expected, Saw VI  milks the original first part again, but the story this time is consistent and without any major holes in logic – it makes sense both on its own and within the context of the franchise (and even those who didn’t watch the previous parts more than once shouldn’t get lost). They also don’t overdo it with the flashbacks, and one of them actually provides an important new angle (to the ending on the third part). The new cast is good (you won’t find here the pieces of wood from the fifth part) and even the change of director was a good decision – I actually couldn’t believe how strong some scenes are in the hands of Greutert, not only with regards of the brutality, but also the emotions (a miracle!). Basically, the characters are believable again, they don’t look as if they didn’t mind finding themselves in “the game”. The twists aren’t impressive (one of them is actually clear from the start), but they are effective – Saw has clearly improved. The ending makes it quite easy to guess what the seventh part will be about, and if the creators decide to change the genre (which is the logical conclusion given who survives and how), they could bring a very needed breath of fresh air to the entire franchise – though this part is also that in its own way. Those who have succumbed to the fad of hating Saw will hate on, but the sixth part will make fans happy. My personal ranking: S1, S2, S6, S3, S4, S5.

If it wasn’t for the constant and impossible to ignore references to the abominable communist ideology, I would give it a higher rating. 5/10

Nothing to write home about, but still a decent ghost story overall. In the last few years we’ve got used to great horror from Spain, so this not very remarkable film might slip through the cracks, but I don’t think it deserves it. The atmosphere is good, the skeleton of the story is uninteresting and unoriginal, but I really liked everything around it (the church, the cinematography). Strong three stars. PS: The female lead has a great name :-D

Hidden is remarkable for its obstinate efforts to scare the viewer every minute from beginning to end, without a break. And it’s quite successful, as long as you don’t realise the messy bollocks you’re watching. Pål Øie should stop writing and stick to directing, where he does a good job. In Dark Woods I didn’t mind the weak plot, basically, the forest and the unknown killer were enough and they managed to fully exploit that (someone else is to blame for the script, Pål is only behind the simple story). Hidden is a completely different thing. It’s evident that their intention was to make a terrifying film with one nightmarish scene after another, but the script unfortunately feels like an inconsistent stew that mixes an incredible number of motifs, with characters behaving only to produce interesting scenes instead of being believable, let alone sensible. I did get scared a couple of times during those 90 minutes, and I appreciated the atmosphere here and there, but the film as a whole felt almost like torture. I can already rank the cruel blond protagonist as the asshole of the year and Hidden as one of the most painful horror experiences, because there’s nothing worse than seeing talent being wasted.

A very pleasant surprise. It’s true that the beginning (i.e. the first hour) could be a lot faster or shorter, but it’s not boring for a second. Likeable characters, a beautiful landscape and fun dialogues, those are the main reasons why I didn’t have any problem with this film and its initial slow pace. The last twenty minutes are brilliant, fast and tense, with a gimmick here and there, like slow motion preceding fast motion. The only flaw in this otherwise perfect thriller are those ten minutes of exposition that may be justified, but up until then the viewer is led by the nose and this scene comes right when the film starts gaining speed, so it’s hard not to look forward to the end of that explanation. Very good summer thriller. 7/10

I’m giving it an average rating, but the only thing that The Haunted World of El Superbeasto isn’t is average. The overwhelming blend of references to everything possible carries the visible signature of Rob Zombie and, although it isn’t particularly hilarious, I did laugh a couple of times. 6/10

After all the controversy around Antichrist, the film itself is quite surprising, or rather, its contents are. In terms of filmmaking, I’m truly fascinated, I’ve watched the prologue five times already and I don’t think I will see anything better this year, but the contents of the film bothered me a little. I didn’t like the transition to the last act, some scenes are too gratuitous and there were moments that I thought could have gone deeper. Basically, the effect wasn’t as intense as I wanted or expected. Even ordinary exploitation horror can sometimes make me feel worse psychically.

When I heard the first reports about Humains last summer, I immediately began to eagerly look forward to it. From my reviews it’s pretty clear that I have a weak spot for horror films that take place in natural or subterranean settings (better if both), humanoid monsters and backwards yokels, and good quality brutality, all of which is has been part of  the French horror new wave. In an ideal world, Humains would be the prototype of a film that delivers everything that I like in the genre, something like the perfect über-horror. The number of stars, however, make clear that this unfortunately wasn’t the case. It’s not a bad film, but it’s far from a gem and I have several problems with it. Firstly, it’s not smart at all. Secondly, it’s not bloody at all. Thirdly, it’s not tense at all. Fourthly, it’s not scary at all. And I ask, what is it actually? And the answer is that it’s some sort of fantastic adventure story (I don’t consider myself a person who minds a certain lack of realism in serious films, but – spoiler – a fully loaded van falling from a 100 metre cliff with almost all the passengers surviving and then they go for a walk in the woods is something that crosses the line of what I’m willing to accept – end of spoiler) with funny cavemen and a mildly WFT ending. This film has a lot to reproach and I’m sure many users will have no mercy, but I only want to point out that I would love to see the route the protagonists took after the accident. At one moment they go downhill, then uphill, then along a river, and then downhill again, it felt quite irrational. Anyway, if your expectations aren’t high, you may like it. 5/10

It’s average and with a pretty good atmosphere, but those three kids were so annoying that my rating is what it is. And I don’t find clowns scary in the least :-)

Warning, underground! In its details, this is a pretty twisted story about love, remorse, revenge and other ordinary things that we find almost everywhere, fortunately, in a far more harmless form. Necromentia is splatterpunk, but quite raw and serious, something you should be aware of before watching it. They don’t spare blood, naked bodies (chubby, cut, disfigured and decomposing – don’t expect any of the pretty models from mainstream horror), and metal props (chains, knives, pipes, wires), often incorporated in various ways into living tissue. Barker is felt very strongly, and this should be taken as praise.