The Mummy

An incredibly moronic piece of crap that applies often completely non-continuous bridges to connect scenes and timelines, utterly fails to functionally or stylistically connect the alternating character journeys (from fantasy horror to bloated adventure comedy, WTF?), and at a point where it should be building up without bullshit and at least visually entertaining the viewer, it locks itself in a room with one of the most useless characters ever played by an A-list actor. Even the otherwise likeable Cruise couldn't help here; something so dull, unimaginative and oddly edited is a disgrace to the thriving Universal of recent years. (08/07/2017)

We haven’t seen such a disappointing mishmash of an A-movie in a while. After the “mirror talk” in the ladies’ restroom, the movie falls into a downward spiral. As a horror adventure set in the present day with a wise-cracking Tom Cruise, it couldn’t have ended well. After a few extraordinarily successful years, Universal wagered on proven blockbuster screenwriters – and it failed spectacularly. You cannot have a cash cow without an idea or enthusiasm. Possibly Russell Crow’s worst role? (06/18/2017)

Totally unworthy of Tom Cruise's star power. Well, yeah, there's a shortage of good original writers in A-list Hollywood productions, or there's no interest in them, so they recycle and reboot to the point of madness to create new film universes. Marvel has theirs, DC Comics has theirs, and starting with this film, Universal has theirs, with the starkly original Dark Universe title that seeks to revive the iconic monsters of the 1930s and 40s horror franchises. But the first runner they sent was a lazy bum who would have lost a 100-meter race to a turtle. This is a fairly routine, formulaic, almost B-movie 100 minutes. Well, let's say that the first 40 minutes or so follow in the footsteps of a mediocre adventure flick with a protagonist and a cute female scientist by his side, with some nice location changes and Cruise talking for his life, culminating in an excellent airplane scene in weightlessness. But with the arrival of Dr. Jekyll (and Mr. Hyde – for the less astute), the film becomes regular crap, throwing in one B-movie cliché after another, with the set never leaving the doctor's office and the dull backdrop of the London catacombs, all drowned in darkness to make it easier to render the CGI. At the end, there is no door, but a gate open for the next sequel and I will definitely not be there anymore. I've always considered Cruise to be a 100% pro who chooses his roles carefully, but he stepped in some serious shit here. Yet he is the only good thing about the whole film, he plays with such commitment that it makes me wish I had as much verve as him at 55. But the positives end there and the overseas reviews really didn't lie this time. This is truly one of the worst films Cruise has left his signature on. (06/10/2017)

All the ingredients you need for an adventurous tale are abundantly present here. Beautiful locations, a stunning damsel in distress, a courageous hero who goes to great lengths, and a mysterious tale as the central theme. But what's the point when there is a desperate lack of substance and balance? Nick is too arrogant in the beginning and then unbelievably noble as time goes on. Ahmanet spends most of her time in dried-up form, so there is nothing specific to fear, and Vail, the joking friend, is pure evil with his boisterous approach. The biggest joy is the fact that Russell Crowe didn't just drop in for a minute, but it is truly disappointing to find out that perhaps every other line was written by a different screenwriter, turning a potential blockbuster into almost a self-parody. I don't want to do a disservice to The Mummy, as I was mildly entertained at times, but its perplexing genre inconsistency, strangely anticlimactic epilogue, and absence of any new idea, where the only adrenaline moment is the airplane crash shown in the trailers, left me feeling frustrated just a few hours after watching it. (06/08/2017)

It's a real shame about this new Dark Universe attempt. It's always nice when a classic gets a new coat of paint so that even the youngest generation can enjoy a new take on it and discover the original at the same time. But this is where it all ended prematurely. Genre-wise it's an unbalanced mess and the whole thing feels terribly confident, and no alternative admits that The Mummy should be a solitary film. But unfortunately, it is, and in retrospect, the aftertaste of the unfulfilled fragment remains. Moreover, Tom Cruise is no longer the rascal he would probably like to remain until his death. Annabelle Wallis, the queen of historical series (The Tudors, Peaky Blinders, and Pan Am), didn't particularly impress me either. Sofia Boutella and Russell Crowe are slightly better, but it's not enough. I was hoping the classic duo of Kurtzman & Orci were enough for it to be great, but Hercules and Zorro were more successful. (11/29/2019)