Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

When you write something so perfectly stupid, you do it either out of incompetence or with creative intent. I give precedence to the second option because Bayona knows where his horror roots lie and thus deftly guides the camera and the special effects, and the actors declaiming like hell and notching clichés into the seat in front of you will stop entertaining you after an hour. However, the slight genre detour with the slamming of the ferry doors works in its favor, and while there are no surprises, it is at times as suspenseful and bloody as its rating will allow. The rain ropes have been passé for a while now, and I would have left 20 minutes on the cutting room floor, but the feeling of a high-octane ride where both lava bombing and sneaking around in the dark work, and which still finishes decently enough a couple of hours after leaving the movie theater, eventually washes it away. (06/27/2018)

To be honest, I'm quite glad I'm over it. The second Jurassic World isn't a bad movie, but I kind of automatically expect a $170 million blockbuster to look good, show off enough attractions to keep me from getting bored, and feature a capable cast. It's all there, but I refuse to take those as positives that would put the film above average. That's just what I expect in a film like this. Trouble is, the second Jurassic World offers nothing but these "obligatory" props. The spectacular action on Isla Nublar is truly epic, but perfectly cold. You know when we're halfway through that none of the protagonists can come to harm, and I really wasn't worried about the bland "geek and badass scientist" side characters. Plus, halfway through, they flip the switch and start pretending to be a variation on Alien. Unfortunately, with a PG-13 rating, an uninteresting monster (compared to what Indominus Rex did last time, this one is really ridiculous), and the same boring characters. The craftsmanship and qualities that can be had on a blockbuster budget are there. But if I were to say I'd want to watch a scene from the second Jurassic World again, I'd be bullshitting. (07/27/2018)

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom was one of the most anticipated blockbusters of the summer, unfortunately it flopped and earned itself the biggest disappointment of the year. Colin Trevorrow delighted most of us with his 2015 debut, but the sequel has been taken on by veteran director J.A. Bayona, and ironically fared worse, which is a shame because his previous The Impossible and The Orphanage are very good genre films. Almost nothing works in this sequel. I'm not going to praise the visuals, because they are a given and I can't really praise anything else. Story-wise, the film is uninteresting, unnecessarily talky with uninteresting characters (Chris Pratt is no longer likeable, he’s annoying), the T-Rex shows up for a total of two minutes, and the finale, which should be scary, is rather laughable and annoying because of the little girl squealing constantly for about half an hour. The only scene worth mentioning is the volcano eruption and the dinosaurs escape, but I find that rather underwhelming from a film that cost 170m to make. The final seconds nicely tease a third installment, which Trevorrow will take on again, so hopefully it will turn out better. A better average for the return of the dinosaurs although they don't have that much space here. Tired, tedious, lacking pace, adrenaline and suspense, I didn't expect such a blow. 60% (06/12/2018)

In its magnificent moments, this is a tremendous experience, and in the surprisingly intimate finale, a flawless combination of an homage to the classic Jurassic Park while at the same time rectifying everything that did not work at the time in Jurassic Park: The Lost World. This seemingly impossible combination ultimately results in the second-best installment of the entire saga, confidently stepping towards a trilogy and solidifying Chris Pratt's position as the darling of the masses. 90% (08/10/2018)

Bayona filmed a kid’s nightmare. A dinosaur in the bedroom! I’m pleasantly surprised that this sequel wasn’t conceived just as a cash grab and that they cooked up a story that fairly original to the extent possible. Though it's full of illogical actions and human stupidity, it's also entertaining (both the opening with the volcano and the chase around the Victorian house). The ending offers an interesting promise for the future. I’m already looking forward to part 3. (09/07/2018)

Technically a first-rate American blockbuster, but it lost the soul of the original and unfortunately also the script of at least the previous one. It must have taken quite a lot of effort to glue together such a sequel, but insulting the intelligence of the audience wasn't exactly necessary. Otherwise, Pratt never disappoints and Ted Levine delivers his best performance since American Gangster. Very mediocre, I think we’ve had plenty of those dinosaurs already. The problem is that this film has earned more than a billion. (09/09/2018)

I'm sorry to say that the magic of the previous film (not to mention Spielberg's original) isn't repeated this time. The dinosaurs are great and often enter the scene in a fully horror way, although the strange script makes some of them unadulterated action heroes and because of it, the film definitely has the worst (lamest) finale of the entire series. Chris Pratt is fine, but this time he's a superman rather than the cheeky sympathetic Owen from Jurassic World, the character played by Bryce Dallas Howard has almost nothing to say at all, and (except perhaps for Ted Levine) I probably won't even remember any of the villains... And I consider Jeff Goldblum's bark to be the greatest betrayal. It’s too bad, because the second Jurassic World looks really great, has some really good scenes (the one with the Brachiosaur standing on its hind legs is 100% moving) and thanks to the bombastic music by Michael Giacchino it also sounds great, but the result is quite similar to Jurassic Park III. (06/20/2018)

It was fun. Though the film is not so effective as a work that is supposed to somehow fundamentally develop the potential and values of its universe ("Life Finds a Way" just doesn't cut it any more), at least it’s perfect as an ultra-expensive fanmade product of Spielberg's legacy. The way it throws you into the plot is downright orgasmic, the story doesn't falter in the space of two hours, and Bayona proves in every scene with the toothy beauties how great a visual expert he is, turning even otherwise routine moments into unadulteratedly powerful (the brontosaurus on the pier) or suspenseful filmmaking (the final half-hour doesn't let up). And I really enjoyed uncovering all the respectful nods towards the first two episodes, which are sometimes obvious (the little girl snapping the hatch in front of the raptor at the last minute), sometimes more subtle on the level of similar shot angles or character positions, but never distracting or jarring. What bothered me, on the other hand, is the character work, which this time looks like from a B-movie, and the creators are lucky that at least the likeable cast can keep the audience's attention (both Pratt and Howard are excellent). And of course, the problem is the story itself – on the one hand, it’s well written in the sense of gradual escalation and, more importantly, in the sense of making the motifs more significant, using the initially hard-to-digest family element at a crucial moment in favour of a logically justifiable twist; but on the other hand, it feels much more contrived and artificial than the overly criticized The Lost World, and it involves genetic machinations of such a magnitude that we feel like we're in a Bradbury anti-utopia; and I personally found the aforementioned twist annoying. In sum, however, perhaps surprisingly, satisfaction prevails over a mature and atmospheric adventure, where every dollar invested is positively visible, and whose magnificent climax made me sincerely look forward to the trilogy's conclusion. 70% (06/26/2018)

As a matter of fact, the little children were those who enjoyed it the most in the cinema. And they are probably the only viewers who appreciate the film. First and foremost, Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is a lazily written story. The screenplay is blatantly gearing towards a third part, which heavily conditions the plot and as a result, on many occasions, it is downright stupid. At one point, there is a sudden digression about some sort of family drama related to clones, which is supposed to act as a moral justification for the fatal behaviour of one of the characters at the end. However, it does not work at all and turns out as utterly useless nonsense. In another part of the film, we learn that surviving a volcanic eruption first-hand is even easier than surviving a nuclear explosion, provided that you hide inside a fridge (wink wink). The most recently made dinosaur designed for military purposes is said to have a highly developed sense of smell, but when chasing the main characters, it doesn’t really seem so. Anytime anyone’s life is seriously threatened, he or she is always saved by a last-minute intervention (preferably by a T-Rex or a raptor, even though these two species had caused the highest number of deaths in the previous films). Basically, whenever the screenwriters came up with something that proved handy, logic was put aside. There is no suspense whatsoever. The promises of horror tendencies remain unfulfilled. The weakest aspect of the whole flick is to be found in its slanted unsubtle characters. There are the ‘bad’ ones and the ‘good’ ones. Nothing in between. The bad ones die, the good ones survive. Nobody surprises us. Some characters suddenly disappear from the story while others are completely useless throughout the film (like the embarrassingly unfunny neurotic IT geek). This is definitely not enough to satisfy me anymore. (06/21/2018)

I've been a fan of Jurassic Park since I first saw it years ago, so I took the return of the giant lizards in the form of a new trilogy as a great and fresh idea. I loved the first Jurassic World! The second didn't win me as much sympathy as its predecessor on first viewing, but after the second screening I found myself liking the film more. (POSSIBLE SPOILERS!) Technically, it is a work of craftsmanship and quality, which is expected for this brand. I was intrigued by the moral level of the film, dealing with whether artificially created dinosaurs have the right to live, or whether they should go extinct for a second time. While the first half of the film takes you back to the park, where I liked the idea of the erupting island (the scene with the dinosaurs and actors fleeing the erupting volcano was excellent, and I take the shot of the moaning brachiosaurus left on the dying island as one of the most powerful moments in the entire franchise), the second half relies heavily on the cramped confines of a big house, which turns into a slaughterhouse in one awkward moment. The first Jurassic World had the Indominus Rex, the second installment introduced the Indoraptor, whose presence made for some atmospherically creepy moments (the scene in Maisie's room is one that no horror film should be ashamed of, and I felt a whiff of the director's previous film, The Orphanage). Overall, I liked the sequences with the dinosaurs arriving on the scene, like the opening with the mosasaur and the T-Rex. I also enjoyed the small cameo by Jeff Goldblum, who had that moralising function in the film. As I mentioned, I had mixed feelings about Fallen Kingdom after the first screening, but after a second viewing I give the film a weaker four stars. (12/23/2018)

I gave the previous installment two stars, so I obviously had to go even lower this time due to the story. I can still recall how excited I was about the original Jurassic Park. Sure, the franchise can hardly come up with something new today, but I have no idea why someone can't write a story which has at least some internal logic and suspense. This way, I spent more than two hours being bored waiting for the traditionally immortal "good guys" to win and for evil to be punished in the end. One star for some cool dinosaurs, but that’s about it. (11/04/2018)